You may find this month’s column strange given that I’m a writer with several books and numerous articles under my belt, and that I practice intellectual-property law – encouraging others to be creative. But, the fact remains, the world would be a better place had some of the inventions that plague our daily lives never been invented.

It is hard to say what is the absolute worst invention of modern times, so I’ll claim a three-way tie: the hot-air hand teasers in public restrooms, plastic grocery bags and auto-answering systems that insist I “talk” to a machine.

Hot-air hand teasers. Call them what you will; redesign them so you stick your hands down in slots; do whatever you like. My hands never get dry. No matter how many times I think, “This time it’ll work and I won’t have to dry my hands on my pants,” they only tease me. I don’t even try them anymore. If it’s a fast-food place like Wendy’s, I go out and grab napkins. If that’s not available, living in dry Colorado, I just let nature dry them. It’s less frustrating, and I don’t hear the chuckle of the machine as it whispers to its neighbor, “We got another one to